The house is full of life, kids running around and doing their own thing, but soon it will be time for the new school term to start, this is the time that George and I should of been doing stuff together but instead the house will be alone, no building castle, walks to the park or anything a dad do with his son. Instead we are saying goodbye to all our lost tomorrows
I have been working on ideas for our little group, I will be talking to snowdrop after the run on how we can work together on these projects and will be announcing them shortly online. If all these happen, I'm sure our baby George would be proud that mummy and daddy still keep the fight going.
Getting my running shoes on, feel more of a bind than a pleasure, when I'm out I have no problems, I don't know what it is, it should be healthy body healthy mind, but I feel blind panic, nothing seem to work,
I will be running and I know I'm not beating an world records, I will be taking each step for George and that will give me the strength to cross the finish line.
The days go past like night and day merging into one another. Nothing but numbers on a calendar, nothing but another day to get up.
The roller coaster world, slowly moving forward, slowly easing you up, then within a second your back down to earth with a splash, before trying your hardest to reach for that happiness once again. I know I have always been a worrier about things that might of never happen but the half empty pessimistic attitude is now a curse.
In just over a month, I will be running in the Great North Run but feel so mentally unfit, i'm not in the best place, I do try to battle the demons but feel I'm not truly prepared for it. Don't get me wrong I can run the distance, I can do it and that's not the issue, I just needed to centre my mind....