The World Just Keeps on Turning

Just sitting here watching others walk past, happy faces strolling by. No one seems to notice the sadness in my eyes or even cares who I am. A person can just disappear from sight even so that they are straight in front and in clear view. The world just turns with everyones self importance in view, the man on the phone for everyone to hear, the boy on the bike with his earphones in, a muffled beat and a glazed look on his face. Mummies and babies chatting about the latest soap. I want to stand up and shout at the top of my voice “LISTEN HERE, GEORGE WAS HERE”, my little man has gone like an Autumn leaf falling to earth. Will he just be our guardian angel, looking to keep us safe. George we m

Father Day

With total dread of this day, it began creeping up on me. I wished and wished for things to get in the way so I wouldn’t have to think about anything, I just wanted to be numb, but it came anyway. I am so grateful of Sarah not making a big thing of it as she could see that the slightest of things would turn the day on its head and put a dark cloud of sadness in my heart. Five days before, work told me I had to work as it was a big day in the calendar, I let them know in no uncertain terms that it wasn’t going to happen. All guns blazing I was ready for a fight, It seem that life and the world keeps turning but not for me, but apart from that the day went well, we all went down to the lakes

Build up to Darkness

Just over a week to go and I dreading the day, father day should be a time for joy but I just want it to go away. Don’t want calls, cards or presents, I just want to left alone. George you would have been the perfect to hold in my arms on this day, I would have just wanted all the family to sit together but instead you be missing. George we are missing you, mummy and daddy xx

Nothing the same

Even walking down the street, nothing feels the same, eyes piercing on my back, with whispers as I turn around. I still walk in a room and feel people will just stop talking and try to change what their are saying, while others don’t think and say the most stupid of things. It could just be me being excessively sensitive. Maybe the world turns and nothing stays the same, we are this weeks chip wrappers and no-one is talking about us, people may just be talking about last night soap and not about real life. George I miss you, my little little man, xx

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